Alberta Family Counselling Service

Family forms the most important part of an individual’s life. Any kind of tension in the family ties leads to depression and sorrow. Due to constantly increasing workloads and pressures to prove oneself, individuals hardly get time to spend with their family members. This leads to gap in communication and eventual fights. This is where the counseling service in Alberta  can help solve various emotional conflicts within the family.

counseling for relationships

Out of the several issues, marriage is the most prominent, which requires delicate and skillful handling. The essentials of a good and sound marriage are love, communication, faith, trust, and commitment towards each other. The problems faced by the couples are better resolved when they are within the context of the couples’ relationship. A couple which is undergoing emotional turmoil seeks advice and help of professionals to smooth things between them. This kind of advice is called counseling.

When couples apply for counseling sessions, the counselor first tries to locate the problem. The counselors then try to mediate between the husband and the wife to bring out their opinions and points of difference. The counseling sessions provide the couples with the apt platform to talk about their views openly. This in turn facilitates them in understanding what the other was thinking and feeling all this while. The communication gap that was present at the starting of the counseling lessens with each successive session.

Marriage And Family Counseling in Alberta

Are there different types of Christian counselors?

Yes, There are many different types of Christian counselors. Gary Collins wrote the first article on the different types. When he first wrote his article he identified five basic categories which are still, for the most part recognized today.

Main Stream Counselors: These counselors receive training known as CPE or Clinical pastoral Education training. These individuals are educated as pastors receiving a complete theological education. When they decide to become counselors they go through a secular training program. Because they have a religious background they are able to integrate the drastically different secular education into their previous religious education

Main Stream Counselors have been criticized for being too liberal. They often negatively view conservative evangelical theologians. They believe that the conservative counselors cause people to steer away from Christian counseling due to the fear that they will be judged and condemned for their behavior. Main Stream Counselors want people to feel that it is OK to be imperfect and that we are all humans, what matters most is that we try to live our lives for God and recognize when we fail. Rather then be condemned for failing they believe that being supportive can help the person avoid failure later on.

Evangelical Pastoral Counselors: These counselors use a counseling theory outlines that the bible is the only foundation of all counseling. These counselors are confrontational, that is, they are very blunt, to the point, and have no problem pointing out when you are at fault for your problems. They take an educational approach to counseling, by the time you are finished with counseling you will have a greater scriptural knowledge to guide your future decisions.

Christian Professionals: The father of Christian counseling Clyde Narramore falls into this category. As does James Dobson, founder of focus on the family, and an outstanding author. These individuals have received a purely secular education and generally, possess state credentials or licensure. These individuals choose to keep their roots in biblical evangelical theology despite their secular background. These counselors have to find ways for integrating their psychological knowledge and skills with biblical truth.

Theoretician Researchers: This group is comprised primarily of university professors. They take a scholarly, scientific approach. As the name implies they work extensively on researching, developing and testing new theories and techniques. These counselors do not necessarily "work in the field" unless their research requires them to do so. Their education is almost always secular, unless they are university professors at a private religious university.

Evangelical Popularizers: This is the set of Christian counselors, who use their education to write self-help books, put together marriage seminars, help youth leaders develop action plans to help troubled youth etc. These counselors aim to help ordinary people who want to help themselves.

The five categories of counselors were identified in 1975 and are still recognized to this day. There have been some changes within each category. For example the evangelical counselors have started to move away from clinical pastoral education in favor of a secular education.

Within the last decade the evangelical pastoral counseling and Christian professional counseling approach has been widely adapted by seminaries. The seminaries have started many masters and doctoral programs that provide an equal mix of theology combined with counseling, therapy, psychology, and marriage and family therapy.

There is a massive and heated debate over the mingling of Christian theory with psychology. One side argues that Christianity and psychology are not compatible at all while others argue that they are completely compatible. Some counselors are somewhere in the middle, and the number of individuals in this category seems to be growing substantially each year.

Counseling Exists For Same Sex Marriages

In our Marriage Counseling Practice we often see couples whose In-Laws are causing problems in the marriage. Whether it is too close, or not close enough, In-Laws can turn into Out-Laws very quickly.

The problems don't always begin the same way. Sometimes there has been no "individuation" (becoming separate) on the part of the adult children. The Bible instructs couples to leave and cleave in order to become one flesh. This is not possible if the adult children do not separate in a healthy way from their parents. The parents may or may not be trying to hang on, but the results can be the same.

When adult children maintain a dependence on their parents after marriage, it interferes with the husband wife relationship. Even when it is disguised as asking for advice from a parent it can cause a division between the couple. If the wife looks to her father for help in making decisions, the husband can feel totally disrespected. He may feel that he (the husband) is not the primary male figure in the marriage.

Likewise if the husband is overly close with his mother the wife is unable to assume the role of nurturer and the number one woman in his life. This is especially true if the couple is living with the parents. This keeps them still in the role of a child.

When adult children receive money from their parents the help often comes with some sort of "strings" attached. This may be overt or covert. Maybe nothing is even said about it.

When parents disapprove of the "in-law "adult child, it puts their child in the middle between the parents and their spouse. The adult child's allegiance should always be to their spouse; number one after the Lord.

A case in point would be when Mary's parents are speaking disrespectfully about Mary's husband Tom behind his back. Rather than defending Tom, Mary should explain to her parents that it's not ok to talk about Tom that way. If Mary's parents continue, Mary should walk away.

If Mary's parents are disrespecting Tom in front of him Mary should get between her parents and Tom and boldly say, "If you continue talking about Tom this way, we will leave."

It is important for couples to keep their "marriage business" private. They should not be discussing their marital issues with their parents, family or friends.

These discussions should be limited to their Pastor, Christian Counselor, or one trusted friend that both spouses' agree on.

We recommend the book "Boundaries in Marriage" by Henry Cloud and John Townsend.

As the Bible says in Genesis 2:24, therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Of course this applies for women as well.

In our Marriage Counseling practice, Marriage Rescue Associates, we regularly see couples who need help restructuring the family dynamic in order to "leave and cleave".

God's Blessing on your marriage. Let it be healthy and happy.

About Marriage Rescue Associates | Christian Marriage Counseling

With over 23 years of experience, Marriage Rescue Associates have discovered many effective methods for helping couples restore their family and marriages. As Christian Marriage Counselors, Marriage Rescue Associates can help construct solutions to rekindle love and rebuild trust that has been torn down by endless conflict, indifference, and unmet needs.

Don't let your marriage or family become another statistic when you can actually do something to change it.

Seek out Marriage Counseling from an experienced Marriage Counselor that understands your situation and makes you feel comfortable with them.

To learn more about Marriage Rescue Associates, visit us online at www.marriagerescue.org


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Marriage And Family Counselor in Stony Plain Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Stony Plain.

grief and loss counselling

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Counseling - A Three Stage Process

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Stony Plain – What Support They Provide

There are couples who stay in an unhappy relationship for the sake of their children. Those who cannot withstand the disagreement and conflict brought by the relationship often end up in divorce. The common mistake of couples is that they fail to consult a marriage counselor to help them with their marital problems. There are those couples who let things happen and do not think of the possible consequences of their actions. Some are afraid and even ashamed to consult a marriage counselor because they do not want other people to know about their problems.

Not all people are the same when it comes to problem solving, there are those who can easily find solutions and there are those who cannot. There are people who cannot solve their problems nor face whatever issue is bothering them. Relationships fail because of many factors. Marital problems are often brought by alcoholism, infidelity, addiction to different substances and many more. Some marriages fail because they do not see marriage counseling to be an effective tool to help them with their problems.

With the help of a certified marriage counselor, married couples will realize better ways on how to solve their conflict. Some of the things that the marriage counselor do is that they teach each partner about proper communication or the right way to talk to their partner. The feature of a good communication skill includes respect and a calm attitude. Open communication gives the partner a little space for them to voice out their opinion in a calm way.

The advantage of marriage counseling is that both partners will learn to address the needs of their partner. Couples will realize as soon as they talk to the marriage counselor that there is a big problem that they need to address. If couples know how to voice out their thoughts in a nice way, then there are great chances of having a healthy relationship. A marriage counselor can definitely help them in developing a sense of oppenness so that they can share whatever problem is bothering them.

Another advantage or benefit of marriage counseling is that couples will learn to express themselves in a positive way.

Some institutions can help couples when they have problems, marital problems brought by drugs or any other form of addiction can be addressed by family therapists and mental health institutions.

The duties and obligations of each member will be upheld in marriage counseling. If the couple will learn about theor obligations to their partners, they can solve any problem that they will encounter.One of the reasons why marriage counseling is effective is because of the activities and progress reports conducted on the couple. A marriage counselor can help save the marriage, especialy if the couples become participative.

From Cary and Crystal Lake, IL: How Anger Destroys Families and How Counseling Can Help

A young couple relocates to a new area.  They are hundreds of miles away from family and friends.  The husband works full time and the wife is a stay at home mom.  They have been in their new area about 1 year.  The wife is becoming bored, lonely and depressed as she does not have any friends or significant social life.  Her husband talks alot about work when he comes home.  He then spends an inordinate amount of time talking on the phone with his work colleagues and friends that he has made.  He goes out frequently without his wife often staying out throught the wee hours of the morning.  Is this a case where marriage counseling is needed?

A gut reaction would be to answer this question as yes, absolutely. There are some serious and significant issues developing in this relationship.  A professional counselor should be able to identify the root of the problems that both individuals in this relationship are not seeing or have ignored.  Once these problems have been diagnosed then the counselor can establish a workable plan that will allow this couple to resolve these major issues.

In looking a little deeper at this situation marriage counseling may not be needed right away.  Why would I say that?  Well, we don'tknow if this couple has ever even discussed this situation or the problems that the wife is perceiving.  Hard to imagine but the husband may not even be aware that there is a problem.  If the wife never speaks up to express her feelings he may think everything is fine, so why change.  The first thing that needs to occur here is the wife needs to communicate to her husband how she feels and make him aware of these issues.  I know, it's hard to believe that he doesn't see it but some people are just that oblivious or just don't care OR she is putting up a good front and doesn't show that anything is wrong.

Another deeper issue in this situation is why doesn't this wife have any friends or why isn't she developing a social network of her own?  Has she made any attempt or effort to meet people and make friends?  If she is a stay at home mom with young kids then certainly there are play groups, play dates, support groups, child activity centers, and community events centered around children that she could become involved in in order to meet other like moms that may be in her situation.  Yes, the husband has issues in this relationship but the wife is relying solely on him for support.  She needs to make an effort to take care of herself. 

Is marriage counseling needed in this case.  I think there are several things this couple can do between themselves prior to iniating the help of a professional counselor.  If they are unable or unwilling to resolve their issues then I would recommend the help of a professional. 


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Alberta Family Counselling Service

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Professional Counseling Services in Innisfail Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Innisfail.

personal counseling services

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Marriage Counseling – Develop The Understanding

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Innisfail – What Support They Provide

If you are having some difficulties in your marriage, or perhaps your family is in crisis, marriage and family counseling can be very beneficial.  While it may initially seem a bit uncomfortable to discuss your problems with a total stranger, if you find a therapist which is a good fit and is good at what he or she does, you will very likely be glad you decided to make the investment. 

Keep in mind, though, that for marriage and family counseling to be helpful, you have to be willing to make some changes in your life.  It won't be helpful if you merely use it as a place to vent or if you expect the therapist to do all of the work for you.  Nor will it be helpful unless you each take responsibility for your contribution to the problem or issue at hand, because rarely is a problem entirely due to one person. 

Following are some of the many ways in which marriage and family counseling can help, if you are ready and willing to do some work.   

Improve communication

Poor communication or lack of communication is often at the core of most marital problems, as well as family problems.  We all grew up learning ways to communicate, but we didn't necessarily learn to do it effectively.  When things are going well, talking is easy.  But the true test of good communication is when there is conflict. 

In marriage and family counseling, the therapist can help you find ways to communicate better with each other.  This not only includes learning how to better express things such as needs, wants, or concerns, but also how to better listen to each other.  Conflict is normal whenever two or more people live in the same household. 

Unfortunately a lot of couples and families do not handle conflict well, and even relatively minor problems can quickly escalate. As a result they become seemingly insurmountable issues when communication completely breaks down or becomes hostile.  Improving communication is the core of dealing effectively with all other issues. 

Learn to choose your battles

Marriage and family counseling can also really help you learn to choose your battles.  Life is going to be full of stressful and irritating things.  That's normal.  But where many couples and families get into trouble is when they let everything become a huge ordeal.  A good therapist can help you determine what the real issues are, while helping your learn to recognize which ones really aren't a big deal.  Learning this will go a long way towards a more peaceful home environment.  

Create new patterns of interaction

As humans, we are creatures of habit.  As a result we get into patterns of interacting with our spouse and family members which can be unhealthy.  At times, they can even be destructive and hurtful.  Sometimes we don't even realize the damage we are doing until someone objective, such as a therapist, points it out. 

Marriage and family counseling is geared towards creating new and healthier ways of interacting with each other.  As the saying goes, if you keep doing the same thing you will keep getting the same result.  But a skilled therapist can show you better ways to get the desired result in your relationship. 

Hopefully you can see how marriage and family counseling might be very beneficial.  Every couple and family has occasional struggles.  Going to a therapist doesn't mean you are weak or a failure.  Rather, it shows that you recognize the need for change and that you desire some assistance in making that happen. 

Benefits of Marriage Counselling

This is a simple three stage approach to counseling. This process is for when someone comes to you with a problem or wanting to talk about something. It is for the 'normal neurotics like you and me", not for dealing with people with serious psychiatric conditions.

It avoids giving advice (a trap for any counseling approach). If you stick to this approach you will do no harm and will probably do much good.

Stage One: Listening

Listening means understanding the content and the feelings that go with it.

Cerebral understanding is not enough.

Never make a statement that defines the issue or the other person's feelings; ask instead. Not, "You're feeling . . . " but instead, "Are you feeling . . ? ". Not, "The issue is . . ." but instead, "You think the problem is . . ." or, "The way you see it is . . . ". At this stage it may be enough to say "uh-huh" or nod your head.

This stage ends when the person starts talking about the issues behind the problem. You will know you have done well when you get agreement to your suggestions of what the issue is and the feeling behind it.

Stage Two: Exploratory Listening

When the person talking to you feels heard they will move on to deeper things. At this stage you can start asking exploratory questions. Asking if they have felt this way before; What they have tried to do in similar situations - whether it worked or not; Whether there are other thoughts and feelings that are going on for them. You can, if you see something clearly, offer observations of what you see. Things like, "You seem happy/sad/angry . . ." and so on. Even here it is probably better to ask a question than to make a statement.

The critical issue at this stage is to stay in touch with their feelings at the depth they are feeling them.

If you can't do this, let them know; don't fake it. You can something like, "Sorry, I can't handle this right now." They will appreciate this more than pretending (and they'll always know if you are just pretending).

This stage ends when the issue is seen differently, a new insight is achieved.

Stage Three: Doing Different Things

Once they see things differently they can start to do things differently, or at least plan to.

The temptation when anyone comes to you with a problem is to try and jump to this stage immediately. This is a mistake. What is needed is the time to explore what is going on and to see it in a new way.

At this stage you can make suggestions of what has worked for you.

Don't get trapped into playing "Yes, but . . .".

If they give reasons why your suggestions won't work, don't argue. Instead, ask what they have tried, why it didn't work, and what they can do differently this time.

You may want to organize that they can check in with you so that they monitor how they are going with their new way of doing things.

This stage ends when they try out new behaviour with you or when they have a plan of the new behaviour they want to try with others.

This process is almost entirely about listening.

The other person always knows more about their own situation than you do.

Never offer advice about what they should do. In the third stage you may wish to say what has worked for you if you have dealt with a similar issue yourself.

With a little practice you can get quite good quite quickly at this process. You may well become someone people come to 'for advice'. As long as you do stick to this process, and don't offer advice, you will do much good and help many people.


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Family Counseling Center in Westlock Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Westlock.

online marriage counseling

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Counseling Exists For Same Sex Marriages

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Westlock – What Support They Provide

In Christian homes when the husband does not assume his Spiritual Leader role a vacuum forms and often the wife is forced into being the leader. This is uncomfortable for the wife since God did not give her that responsibility. It can create a great deal of resentment in both the wife and also the husband who can interpret this as “control”.

When the wife is forced into filling this role it can often lead to being the leader in many other ways. Now there is real danger of inappropriate balance of control in the home.

In our Marriage Counseling practice we see this situation often. We are presented with couples that are not filling the roles that they were designed to fill. When we speak with the wife who is perceived as controlling by her husband, she often tells us that she would give anything to “get off the throne” and follow her husband, but he just won’t lead.

What can she do? What can he do? The first step is to understand who God has called us to be. God has called the husband to be the “servant leader” in the home, even going so far as to lay down his life for his wife and family as Christ laid down His life for the Church. We see many husbands who would step in front of a bus for their wives but neglect to protect their wives in the day to day business of life.

There may be a number of reasons why he is not “stepping up to the plate” as leader. Oftentimes we see passive men marry more outgoing and active women. The man’s passivity becomes a serious problem in these relationships. He stays in his comfort zone, not realizing or caring what this is doing to the relationship. In this case, it is important for the wife to step aside and not lead; even if things fall through the cracks. The husband cannot fill a role that is already filled. He cannot lead if she is leading. It may seem very scary, but it is absolutely necessary to let him fill the role.

It may also be that she has always felt like she is the one who should be in control, thinking her husband as incapable of leading. It is particularly important for her to turn over the reins to her husband.

Sometimes it has nothing at all to do with the wife. Some men are just so passive that it would never dawn on them to be the leader. In this case it may require counseling from your Pastor or Marriage Counseling from a Christian Marriage Counselor.

So, what should the husband do? After realizing and understanding that this is his God given role, he will need to confront the fear of operating in the unknown. His job is to make sure that he understands who is in Christ. There are many good books written on this subject. God gives us the Grace to do what He calls us to do, so the husband is able to lead.

There are practical things that a Spiritual Leader does. He makes sure that he has his own personal time with God on a daily basis. That he “talks” with God on a regular basis. This includes more than just speaking to God (what we normally call praying) but listening as well. He himself needs to be strengthened before he can successfully lead others.

He is responsible for making sure he and his wife spend joint time with God. This can include Bible Study, prayer, attending a Church that fulfills both of them and making sure the whole family is included if there are children in the home.

He is also responsible for protecting the home from any outside bad influences or spiritual attacks.

He can also see that he and his wife become active in a small group at their Church. This will help surround the couple with fellow believers who are like minded and are there for each other.

This may seem like a big job, but God never gives us a job too big for us to handle.

We pray that your marriage fulfills God’s calling and that both you and your Spouse search out what God has in store for you. If you both are close to God, you will be close to each other.

From Cary and Crystal Lake, IL: How Anger Destroys Families and How Counseling Can Help

A family is the building block of a society, and happy families make a healthier society. The main purpose of Marriage CounselingChattanooga is to make healthy relationship of marriages. Marriage counselling helps couples at all stages of married life, including a pre-marriage or post marriage. Relationship in balance is a top most company that offers best quality services to people who want to deal with marital problems. This counseling helps in improving relationships and resolving conflicts between couples. You should go over these three steps from marriage counselling which helps in saving your marriage: Communicate better and when necessary:

The main reason for marital failure is the lack of communication or miscommunication among couples and when difficulties arise, people stop doing proper communication with one another. So, a married relationship can't be saved when the couple can't communicate productively together. Whenever a new problem comes up, couples must communicate with each other and the standard of communication needs to be effective too. You should have to be listen to your partner carefully and discus your problems without any hesitation.

Decide to compromise: Marriage Counseling Chattanooga suggest you keep in mind that other areas of everyday living aren't that important at day's finish. If you select to compromise, you are allowing your respect and love for each other to possess a greater priority compared to the issue at hand. Be the first one to compromise and before very long, you'll both be prepared to meet in the middle.

Take the time to demonstrate more love and affection: Many marriages fail because of the fact people feel that they're not loved or properly taken care of by their partner. No matter the problem, you must keep in mind that feeling loved is essential.Couples Counseling Chattanooga providesservices that help couples to understand the basic components of the marriage.Whenever you want to do commitment with your partner then, it is always best to consult a couple counsellors in chattanooga. It should help you to identify the compatibility areas and areas of conflict that may arise after the marriage.

Marriage counselling services can help couples to begin their happy married life in good and positive way. This counseling helps in providing an environment where a couple can feel safe to share their thoughts and feelings with confidence.Christian Marriage Counseling Chattanooga helps in improving your relationship with spouse by straightening behavioral problems and correcting emotional and mental disorders.It offers assistance to a married couple on the basis of christian values and principles. This counselling will help couples to talk about the problems in their lives and find ways to resolve these problems.


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Professional Counseling Services in Calgary Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Calgary.

therapy for families

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Marriage Counseling - How to be the Spiritual Leader in your home

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Calgary – What Support They Provide

The primary difference between secular counseling and Christian counseling is the authority of which the counselor is held accountable. Secular counselors are licensed by the state in which they practice and must strictly adhere to the rules that the state has in place. These counselors may not pray with their patients or discuss religion at all unless it is requested or initiated by the patient. They may not provide counsel against things including abortion and homosexuality.

In contrast, Christian counselors will answer to the church. They are required to ask for God's help, offer religious solutions to their patients and pray with them. This creates a sense of responsibility by the church to over the activities that these counselors engage in. These are the most distinct differences between the two types of counselors.

Secular counselors will normally have a master's degree. Many of them will hold a PhD too. A religious counselor will have a degree from a university that specializes in religion while a secular counselor will receive training from one of the state certified schools.

Secular or non-religious counseling is dyadic in nature. It is based solely on the relationship between the counselor and his or her patient. While it is effective in addressing both emotional and mental issues, it does not consider spiritual matters. Christian counseling is triadic in that it not only is about the relationship between the therapist and patient but also involves the patient's spirituality. For this reason, Christian counseling is unique.

These therapists not only work to provide guidance in resolving personal and emotional challenges, but also are trained specifically to the patient see themselves as God sees them and help them to learn to accept themselves how they are. They must be able to help their patients to live and exhibit behavior that is in line with what is written in the bible.

Secular counseling involves many different designations including L. P. C. (licensed professional counselor,) L. M. F. T. (licensed marriage and family therapist) and L. M. H. C. (licensed mental health counselor.) The same can be said for Christian counseling who also feature a variety of designations. Some of them include L. P. C. (licensed pastoral counselors,) L. C. P. C. (licensed clinical pastoral counselors) and C. C. C. (certified Christian counselors) to mention just a few.

When seeking counseling from a Christian counselor, ensure that he or she was trained and licensed by either a church or other similar organization that will hold them accountable for their actions. Two of the most renowned associations include the National Christian Counselors Association and the Board of Christian Counselors.

What really matters when selecting a counselor is that you find one that is truly motivated to help you. Do not be afraid to request a telephone conference first to find out more about the beliefs that your therapist has to ensure that you both share the same religious viewpoints and morals. Taking this time in the beginning can save a lot of time and trouble in your search for the right therapist.

5 Types of Christian Counselors

Are there different types of Christian counselors?

Yes, There are many different types of Christian counselors. Gary Collins wrote the first article on the different types. When he first wrote his article he identified five basic categories which are still, for the most part recognized today.

Main Stream Counselors: These counselors receive training known as CPE or Clinical pastoral Education training. These individuals are educated as pastors receiving a complete theological education. When they decide to become counselors they go through a secular training program. Because they have a religious background they are able to integrate the drastically different secular education into their previous religious education

Main Stream Counselors have been criticized for being too liberal. They often negatively view conservative evangelical theologians. They believe that the conservative counselors cause people to steer away from Christian counseling due to the fear that they will be judged and condemned for their behavior. Main Stream Counselors want people to feel that it is OK to be imperfect and that we are all humans, what matters most is that we try to live our lives for God and recognize when we fail. Rather then be condemned for failing they believe that being supportive can help the person avoid failure later on.

Evangelical Pastoral Counselors: These counselors use a counseling theory outlines that the bible is the only foundation of all counseling. These counselors are confrontational, that is, they are very blunt, to the point, and have no problem pointing out when you are at fault for your problems. They take an educational approach to counseling, by the time you are finished with counseling you will have a greater scriptural knowledge to guide your future decisions.

Christian Professionals: The father of Christian counseling Clyde Narramore falls into this category. As does James Dobson, founder of focus on the family, and an outstanding author. These individuals have received a purely secular education and generally, possess state credentials or licensure. These individuals choose to keep their roots in biblical evangelical theology despite their secular background. These counselors have to find ways for integrating their psychological knowledge and skills with biblical truth.

Theoretician Researchers: This group is comprised primarily of university professors. They take a scholarly, scientific approach. As the name implies they work extensively on researching, developing and testing new theories and techniques. These counselors do not necessarily "work in the field" unless their research requires them to do so. Their education is almost always secular, unless they are university professors at a private religious university.

Evangelical Popularizers: This is the set of Christian counselors, who use their education to write self-help books, put together marriage seminars, help youth leaders develop action plans to help troubled youth etc. These counselors aim to help ordinary people who want to help themselves.

The five categories of counselors were identified in 1975 and are still recognized to this day. There have been some changes within each category. For example the evangelical counselors have started to move away from clinical pastoral education in favor of a secular education.

Within the last decade the evangelical pastoral counseling and Christian professional counseling approach has been widely adapted by seminaries. The seminaries have started many masters and doctoral programs that provide an equal mix of theology combined with counseling, therapy, psychology, and marriage and family therapy.

There is a massive and heated debate over the mingling of Christian theory with psychology. One side argues that Christianity and psychology are not compatible at all while others argue that they are completely compatible. Some counselors are somewhere in the middle, and the number of individuals in this category seems to be growing substantially each year.


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Licensed Marriage And Family Therapist in Brooks Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Brooks.

find a clinical psychologist

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

5 Types of Christian Counselors

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Brooks – What Support They Provide

Marriage counseling gives people a chance to work out issues with their partners whether it be their boyfriend or girlfriend or their spouse. This process is also referred to as couples counseling. Marriage counseling gives couples the tools to improve their relationship and to learn how to better relate to one another. 

Marriage counseling should be done by a licensed counselor who has a certification in marriage and family counseling. These counselors do pretty much the same as any other counselor but they focus on helping couples. 

In most cases, couples only need to meet with a marriage counselor a few times to work out their problems. Couples who are having more severe problems can attend marriage counseling for several months, though. Marriage counseling usually occurs on a weekly basis.

Marriage Counseling Can Help Everyone

All couples have issues that they need to work through. Each person has different beliefs, ambitions, values and wants different things from their lives and this can cause conflict. If you learn how to work together, though, there does not have to be conflict because of your differences. Couples can learn to appreciate their partner's unique views and ways of looking at things and this can actually strengthen your relationship.

At times, though, the things that make you and your partner unique can cause problems. The habits and quirks that you found cute in the beginning of the relationship can start to drive you crazy. Relationships can start to suffer if there is a traumatic event such as one partner cheating on the other. The relationship may also suffer if the couple starts to drift apart and starts to fell like they aren't connected anymore.

Regardless of what the reason for the problems in your marriage, it is very stressful and upsetting to be dealing with them every day. A lot of people ignore their problems and think they will just get better over time. The truth is the problems will probably get worse over time and cause more distress and even depression. The people around you can feel the tension when you are having marriage problems and you can even have trouble focusing at work because of the problems.

Marriage counseling can help couples overcome a variety of problems including the following:

A partner who has had an affair
Talk of divorce
Drug or alcohol abuse
Dealing with physical or mental illness
Gay and lesbian issues
Cultural differences
Money issues
Loss of a job
Step family issues
Trouble communicating
Issues with your sex life
Different opinions on raising children
Infertility issues
Anger management
Major life changes like retirement

Marriage Counseling and Domestic Violence

In some cases, marriage counseling can be helpful for couples dealing with domestic violence issues. If the violence has gotten to the point where you are afraid that you or your children will be seriously hurt you should seek help from the police or an organization dealing with domestic violence like a shelter. Marriage counseling by itself may not be enough to help in a relationship with domestic violence issues. 


Marriage Counseling to Avoid Problems

Not all couples who enter marriage counseling do so because they have issues that need to be dealt with. Sometimes marriage counseling is used to strengthen a relationship and help prevent issues from arising in the future. Marriage counseling can also help couples deal with issues before they even get married. Going to marriage counseling before getting married helps couples figure out how to work through the differences that are bound to arise in their marriage.

What Happens in Marriage Counseling?

Marriage counseling gets both people in a relationship in the same room to talk with the counselor. The counselor attempts to help the couple understand what is causing their problems and work on ways to better deal with the problems. Both the people in the relationship get to share their views of what is going on, both good and bad, in the relationship.

Through marriage counseling, couples will learn how to work together. The counselor will teach the couple communication skills and help them learn how to disagree in a healthy way. If there are serious issues causing the problems in the marriage like drug or alcohol abuse or mental illness than other specialists might be brought in to help resolve those issues. 

Talking about your problems and issues in marriage counseling is sometimes difficult. You and your partner may find yourselves sitting quietly and refusing to speak to each other because you are so angry. Or you may find yourselves having a huge argument right there in the counselor's office. The marriage counselor is there to intervene and help you calmly discuss issues without implying that either of you are right or wrong.

Marriage counseling can make a difference in your marriage in a very short time. In some cases, though, marriage counseling may make you and your partner realize that you really do not belong together.

If your spouse or partner won't consider going to marriage counseling you should think about going alone. Obviously, marriage counseling is more effective if both partners attend but if you go alone you can learn how you can make a difference in the marriage by changing some of your behaviors and thought patterns.

The decision to attend marriage counseling is not usually an easy one but it is well worth the effort. Marriage counseling is a much better way to deal with issues in your marriage than hoping they go away on their own.

Christian Counselors in the Church - Partners in Caring

QUALITIES OF THE COUNSELOR: Genuineness, Empathy, Warmth, Unconditional Positive Regard

Genuineness, empathy, warmth, and unconditional positive regard are the core counselor qualities. Some people possess these qualities because of their philosophy and personality. Others can develop them through awareness and practice.

genuineness

By genuineness I am referring to sincerity, and this is something that is conveyed by means of eye contact and facial expression. I am communicating non-verbally that what my client has to say is of the greatest importance and I am truly interested in it. So I speak of genuineness as opposed to being mechanical; a counselor who uses stock phrases or who uses too much or misplaced humour and does not take the client seriously enough is not going to be able to come across with genuineness and sincerity.

Being real; genuine. Which carries along with it the importance of being one's self instead of putting on some kind of role. In other words the way you are as a counselor in terms of your overall style and the way you come across needs to be the way you are in any relationship or situation. It is not a role, or a hat that you put on and take off. Insincerity may be communicated when the counselor looks away, being easily distracted, looking at his watch, yawning; showing by these behaviours that he really is not interested in the client's issues.

Is this sincerity and genuineness a cultural thing? Or is it cross-cultural? In North America there seems to be an emphasis on sincerity in relationships. If someone's not sincere in a relationship people don't like it as much, whereas in Europe there's more give-and-take and they take on roles more easily.

There may be different signals of sincerity. For example, in some cultures the emphasis on eye contact wouldn't be as great as in the Western culture. In native culture, or black culture, and some other cultures there's a noticeable lack of eye contact or different eye contact as compared to Western cultures. For example, in some non-white cultures, the person may look at you when talking and look away when listening which you may interpret as not listening if you are not aware of the custom. Eye contact can be different for men and women; women tend not to look men in the eyes, especially in some Eastern cultures which are patriarchal.

seating arrangement

Another point to make here is regarding seating arrangement and body language in counseling. In addition to frequent eye contact, sitting with your legs uncrossed and with your arms uncrossed resting on the arms of the chair, may communicate a relaxed openness to the client.

Also, in terms of the angle of the chairs, about a 100 degree or a little more than a 90 degree angle tends to maximize the comfort of the client because this allows him to look past the counselor without turning his head away. Whereas if chairs are directly facing each other, this tends to set up a sense of confrontation. The distance of the chairs should be no more than three feet and not closer than two feet. This range communicates support, whereas if the chairs are too close, I may communicate intrusiveness or if the chairs are too far apart, I may communicate a lack of support for the client. Non-verbal rapport is important to the counseling relationship.

empathy

The next quality is empathy. I am speaking specifically of accurate empathy, the ability to be connected to the feelings, to the emotions of the client. So if the client is feeling sad, the counselor needs to have a sense of that sadness and be able to mirror it in voice tone and facial expression.

For example, I had a client whose little boy was killed by a city utility truck, and as she talked about the incident she was feeling sad and I felt very sad as well. Now I think it was easy for me to connect because I have a little boy, and at the time he was six or so, about the age her little boy was. I found that I was able to feel very sad. In fact it was all I could do to keep from breaking down and crying.

A rule of thumb with your empathy is not to allow your own feelings of sadness to overshadow the expression of your client's sadness. So if I were to break down and cry and my client is just feeling sad, but not crying, then that may have a particular effect on my client. Can you imagine what that may be? She'd feel like she had to cry. She becomes a caregiver. So the roles get reversed. She could become the caregiver. The focus would be taken away from the client. Also, I may be seen as fragile and as someone who needed to be protected from the client's pain. So the client may tend to hold back her painful experiences for fear that I may break down and cry. I may appear to be overly sensitive and fragile.

Empathy is conveyed in non-verbal ways such as tearing or a frown if the client's feeling is sadness. Keep in mind that empathy must also be genuinely felt and genuinely mirrored. Any insincerity from the counselor will erode the client's feeling of safety.

Essentially I will be mirroring the emotional content or the emotions of my client whether the feeling is anger, sadness, fear, or some other feeling. Some counselors have said that empathy is the most therapeutic counselor quality because it lends support to the client's pain.

Empathy may also be conveyed verbally in the voice tone. And so I will speak with empathic reflections. This is a statement that reflects back what the client has been saying, accompanied by a feeling word. An empathic reflective statement would be, "So you're feeling sad because your good friend just moved away, is that what you're feeling?"

When you as the counselor show tears what does the client perceive? Is the client going to think you don't really understand or is he going to become defensive? If your tears are an accurate reflection of the client's feeling, and if your expression of feeling is a little bit less than the client's expression of feeling, your empathy is likely to be accepted as support. However, something else that may happen is that the client's own engagement of emotion is scary for him so that he withdraws. This is an issue of the client's not feeling safe with himself or perhaps with you, which I will speak about in a few minutes.

warmth

The next quality is warmth, and here I am talking about non-possessive warmth, as opposed to cool detachment. Warmth is caring that is conveyed in a soft and gentle voice tone and facial expression. Warmth may be conveyed in a non-verbal way and a non-possessive way. Now what would possessive warmth be? Smothering. Too touchy-feely. Smothering in that way. In a physical way, giving too much physical caring. Sometimes a counselor will like to give out hugs or want to hug a client more for the counselor's own needs than for the client. And so that can become possessive.

A female counselor was mentioning that she would touch and sometimes have it misread. It wasn't a prolonged contact, just a touch. So the client was interpreting any physical contact as something possessive. I want to talk about touching a little more when we get down to boundaries; touching is a boundary issue.

Verbal warmth can be experienced as possessive if it is excessive in terms of the warm voice tone or in terms of verbal content if it is overstated. This may be perceived as lacking sincerity or as superficial and shallow, or if it is perceived as sincere it is experienced as being too mothering and protective or condescending, treating the client too much as a child.

We can understand warmth by its opposite quality which is to be cold. In this case the voice tone is emotionally flat, detached and mechanical, and verbal content may tend to understate the client's plight. It is a style which communicates aloofness, distance, and unconcern.

unconditional positive regard

Another important attribute is unconditional positive regard. Some people believe that this is the most curative or therapeutic thing that a counselor can provide. This implies a particular mental attitude: that the client's problems and feelings are of the greatest importance. This session is the most important session for the client, and the client himself is as valuable as the most highly respected person on earth even if he does not believe that he is.

I am regarding the client's behaviour, no matter how self-destructive or even destructive of others it may be, as having a story behind it that allows it to make sense, that makes it understandable even though the client is responsible for choosing it.

The belief is that a person will make choices that are best for himself if he is aware of all the possible choices. If I have this ability to convey unconditional positive regard it is going to be possible for me to sincerely validate my client, to bring all my best ability and expertise to the session, to listen and focus on the client, to accept the client's pace and process of recovery.

That would be like having Charles Manson, the mass-murderer, as a client. Yes, he killed a lot of people, however, he does have the possibility or the potential for change. So he's here and my task is to help him to be the best person that he can be from what appears to be the worst.

You see the person as having intrinsic value apart from his behaviour, and you see his behaviour as having an understandable story behind it. And that will allow us to be able to remain in a helping position with our client. There may be some types of people, such as Charles Manson, that we would not be able to maintain an unconditional positive regard for. What are some other types of clients that you may have trouble with? Perhaps sexual offenders, serial killers, rapists, child abusers.

Could that perhaps be why they are some of the hardest to cure or change? It's hard to find people who are able to work with those types of individuals. It's difficult for a counselor to work in those circumstances and still separate himself to such an extent that he becomes a part of the solution rather than part of the problem. It can be a challenge to keep from reacting judgmentally and lose one's effectiveness in that way. So what should we do if we cannot maintain unconditional positive regard for a client? Have him seek someone else, perhaps. In this circumstance you might say, "I'm not sure I'll be able to help you as much as you may need." Make a referral and own it as your problem that you don't have the skills to help him.

When you say to the client, "I don't feel that I have the skills that you need to get the help that you need," you show you are accepting responsibility for your limitations, rather than blaming the client. Along with that goes the ability to be non-judgmental. I need to be able to regard the client's behaviour in terms of behaviours which work well and which do not work well for the client's functioning, rather than in moral terms. So we need to be aware of the range of judgmental terms to bee left out of the counseling relationship and left out of our counseling vocabulary.

Rather than say to a client, "Do you think that's wise or do you think that's right?" I'm going to say, "Does that work well for you?"

The question is what works well in relationships and what doesn't work well, rather than what behaviour is right or what behaviour is wrong. Terms like inconsiderate, or imprudent, or unwise, irresponsible, right or wrong, good or bad, are judgmental terms. Unconditional positive regard goes beyond being non-judgmental and most certainly includes being non-judgmental. The client usually brings too much self-judgment with him, so he does not need ours piled on top of his.

You have unconditional positive regard for the client to the degree you have it for yourself; that same degree for someone else. So I think it's a matter of degrees... possibly to realize how silly it would be and I'm at 60 or 70 percent of my ability to be non-judgmental and that's the way it is; and putting aside that and still being as totally open as possible. I mean there's no 100%.

There is a point where you choose not to be judgmental. I may feel judgmental but a client doesn't have to know that. I can choose not to express it; I can filter that out. The choice of leaving your stuff behind and going there without your stuff so it doesn't get in the way of your work with the client.

The client is already self-blaming enough; already bringing enough self-judgment and guilt with him, so he doesn't need your judgment of him. The dependent client may allow you to judge him and he will return to the session. In any case, judgment tends to erode safety.

The counselor can be viewed similar to a defence lawyer who is appointed by the court to defend and support the client. You can't make any judgments and you give unconditional support. It's as if the client tends to be his own prosecutor and presents the negative self-talk, for example.

It has to do with a fundamental view of humanity that everyone is sincere and well-intentioned and that people have problem behaviours for understandable reasons. In other words, a client may not have been responsible for beginning his unhealthy patterns that were adopted as a means of surviving painful life experiences. However, although the person was responsible for starting the patterns and although they seemed to work well during childhood for example, the client is responsible for perpetuating those patterns in adult life, and they do not work well now or he would not be in counseling. Maybe there was an abusive background or there was unhealthy parental modeling, there was a tragic loss of a loved one, for example, and these experiences resulted in some adaptive behaviour that does not work well in adult life and relationships.

There's always a story there that allows the client's behaviour or problems to make sense and that allows us to remain non-judgmental of the client and to maintain positive regard. I recently heard a counselor tell a client during the first session, "What are you complaining about? What are you complaining about now?" Well that's a very judgmental way to approach a client, to assign to her problems the word "complain" or "complaining."

Some counselors may justify that by saying they are trying to elicit a transference reaction. In my view what they are doing is abusing the client to encourage the expression of feelings the client has been unable to deal with. But the end does not justify the means. It does not justify a non-professional approach; a destructive, abusive approach which could harm the client. If I can not predict a therapeutic outcome of my statement, I am not engaging in professional counseling.


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Marriage And Family Counselor in Banff Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Banff.

couples counseling center

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Finding The Right Family Therapist

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Banff – What Support They Provide

Despite widespread protests and more than 19 states barring same sex marriages, many licensed professional counselors are now offering gay-lesbian-specific sessions and even pre marriage counseling. Whether it's called a "marriage," a "domestic partnership" or a "civil union," this new market is opening to ensure healthy relationships and normalized households. As more gay couples opt for adoption and child rearing, it's become increasingly more important for a family marriage counselor to offer same sex couple services too.

In some ways, a same sex marriage will suffer the same trials and tribulations as their heterosexual counterpart, as both will argue about finances, power struggles, household chores, child rearing, autonomy and intimacy. Also, a 2008 study by the American Psychological Association found that same sex couples are just as happy and committed in their romantic relationships as heterosexual couples.

However, researchers have also noted that civil marriages of gay and lesbian couples showcase different conflict styles. Same sex marriages researcher and author Esther Rosenblum found that "Same-sex couples tend to use effective arguing. They give each other a fair hearing, and their conflicts are brief and quickly forgotten. Heterosexual couples argue ineffectively.

Their conflicts are more frustrating and don't get solved for days." She adds that gay and lesbian couples come from the same cultural backgrounds, which makes it easier for them to resolve conflicts. "When women argue, they tend to focus on the relationship, and when men argue, they tend to focus on logic and problem solving," she explains.

Therapy for same sex marriages can help a couple stay together, says Michael Halyard, who runs a gay-lesbian-bisexual couples retreat center and clinic in San Francisco, California. He says that pre marriage therapy helps gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender couples withstand challenges, improve communication, deepen intimacy and improve patterns of relating. "If couples designate just a fraction of their wedding budget on premarital counseling, it could go a long way to ensure them living happily ever after, and is money well-spent," says Halyard. More information can be found at Sftherapy website.

Need Marriage And Family Counseling?Get The Answer Here!

The film ordinary people is a film that depicts a family that is struggling socially due to some psychological problems that the members of the family are going through. The film depicts Conrad as a boy who is going through psychological problems due to an accident which occurred while he was sailing with his older brother Buck who died. The boy is also going through problems as his mother and father do not show him the love as they used to show his brother. He decides to go to see a psychiatrist. His mother has a disagreement with him for going to tell Dr Berger matters that she thought were supposed to be private matters. His father also struggles to connect with him in his depression. He regains some optimism when he falls in love with Jeannie but then the situation worsens due to the murder of Karen. He is advised by the Psychiatrist to understand his mother the way she is. The mother also has a problem as she isolates herself from the rest of the family including her husband Calvin who finally confronts her. In this confrontation, the mother decides to pack her belongings and leaves the family. When Conrad realizes that his mother has left, he blames himself and that causes the father to rebuke him. The father finally calms down and they are in a position solve their differences and they finally start working together so as to understand the reason as to why the mother behaved so towards them.

There are different types of theories that are used in a counseling session. Different theories are applicable to different situations or different cases. In the above case, the strength based theory would apply well in counseling Conrad's mother and father. This is a theory which focuses on showing the client the positive side of his or her life. This is done by guiding the client in the reflection of the past, present achievements or success. These successes are the ones that the client is supposed to use to face the challenges in his or her life. The main aspect in this theory is positive thinking (Sharry 2004).

There are many factors that contribute to mental health and psychological distress. There are social and biological factors. Traumatic injury of the brain usually causes mental disorders or heightens the risk of having mental distress, substance abuse which causes damage or dysfunction of the brain, viral infections, failure of the neurotransmitters systems to function properly and etc are some of the biological factors.  Social factors include life experiences that are stressful, rejection from close associates, some cultural features and abuse or financial problems. For these factors, the role of the counselor will be first to identify the cause of the problem if the problem and whether it requires medical interventions. Afterwards, the counselor should advise the client accordingly. If the problems are social, then the counselor is supposed to guide the client on the mechanisms to reduce stress over the problems and try to take another more constructive view of the problem. As I had earlier mentioned, the best intervention is making the client reflect on the successes in life and start working from there in solving the problem (Corey 2007).

There are values that are necessary for the counselor. As a counselor, I am supposed to try and build a strong relationship with the client. This should be done by giving an understanding that is empathetic which will make the client to have a compassionate understanding. There is supposed to be a show of genuiness and congruency. Then there is need to show the client respect because of the pain and suffering he or she is going through and also provide the client with hope for the future (Sharry 2004).

One of the strengths of the theory is that there is emphasis on the positive aspect of solving problems without minimizing them. This theory also helps the client in recognizing their abilities in solving the problems they are going through and also help them to put the solutions in practice. It encompasses a show of respect, security and puts more insights. However on the other hand, the theory can kill careers on the areas where one does not perform well. Sometimes it also becomes difficult to concentrate on successes. Sometimes the negatives assist in coming up with a positive perspective. It may not be so practical to do away with failures in life (Perdeson 2007).

The strength based theory would be applicable in counseling of Conrad's parents. This would work by showing them that they should be happy that Conrad survived the accident. They should also be reminded about the happier days that they have lived and loved each other in the past so that they can apply what they used to do then to their life now. It would also be good to make them appreciate their son as there are many people who would have liked to have a son but they do not and also appreciate the fact that despite what their son is going through, he can find a girl to love him. The goal of the therapy would concentrate on making the two find something to enjoy in life (Oren 2009). The best method to evaluate the therapy is for one to find out whether the parents are living happily together and also find out whether the parent's treatment of the son has improved. The limitation of this approach would be making the family forget the past and current challenges despite the fact that the challenges may appear again in future.

In conclusion, this theory can work very well with those clients who are having problems that have come out due to them filling their minds with a lot of negativity. It would help them to have a positive perspective in their lives.

References

Corey, G. (2007).Theory and practice in group counseling, Cengage learning

Perdeson, P. (2007).Counseling across cultures, SAGE publications

Oren, Z. (2009).Counseling fathers, CRC press

Sharry, J. (2004).Counseling children, adolescents and families: A strength based approach.


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Counseling Center in Black Diamond Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Black Diamond.

top marriage counselors

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Marriage Family Counseling Can Save Marriages

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Black Diamond – What Support They Provide

A family is the building block of a society, and happy families make a healthier society. The main purpose of Marriage CounselingChattanooga is to make healthy relationship of marriages. Marriage counselling helps couples at all stages of married life, including a pre-marriage or post marriage. Relationship in balance is a top most company that offers best quality services to people who want to deal with marital problems. This counseling helps in improving relationships and resolving conflicts between couples. You should go over these three steps from marriage counselling which helps in saving your marriage: Communicate better and when necessary:

The main reason for marital failure is the lack of communication or miscommunication among couples and when difficulties arise, people stop doing proper communication with one another. So, a married relationship can't be saved when the couple can't communicate productively together. Whenever a new problem comes up, couples must communicate with each other and the standard of communication needs to be effective too. You should have to be listen to your partner carefully and discus your problems without any hesitation.

Decide to compromise: Marriage Counseling Chattanooga suggest you keep in mind that other areas of everyday living aren't that important at day's finish. If you select to compromise, you are allowing your respect and love for each other to possess a greater priority compared to the issue at hand. Be the first one to compromise and before very long, you'll both be prepared to meet in the middle.

Take the time to demonstrate more love and affection: Many marriages fail because of the fact people feel that they're not loved or properly taken care of by their partner. No matter the problem, you must keep in mind that feeling loved is essential.Couples Counseling Chattanooga providesservices that help couples to understand the basic components of the marriage.Whenever you want to do commitment with your partner then, it is always best to consult a couple counsellors in chattanooga. It should help you to identify the compatibility areas and areas of conflict that may arise after the marriage.

Marriage counselling services can help couples to begin their happy married life in good and positive way. This counseling helps in providing an environment where a couple can feel safe to share their thoughts and feelings with confidence.Christian Marriage Counseling Chattanooga helps in improving your relationship with spouse by straightening behavioral problems and correcting emotional and mental disorders.It offers assistance to a married couple on the basis of christian values and principles. This counselling will help couples to talk about the problems in their lives and find ways to resolve these problems.

Advantages Of Marriage Counseling

Divorces don't have happy endings or simple solutions.  Although some divorcing partners believe it is possible to break cleanly, their children might have issues of their own. It is easy to discount the toll taken on finances and feelings. Marital troubles may often be remedied by consulting a marriage family counselor, except in cases involving abuse.

Couples counseling has been able to stop many divorces from happening. Occasionally, troubles stem from failing to adequately express and communicate objectives, dreams, aspirations, or expectancies. With conflict resolution and communication skills, it is possible for a couple to regain happiness in a sound relationship. Expert, licensed counselors offer extensive backgrounds of training, study and expertise along with an unbiased opinion. Occasionally, individuals don't completely realize the underlying issues of a problem. When this is the case, a marriage counselor may help to pinpoint the source of the conflict. Partners are able to discover how to work through troubles, forgive, and go beyond the past.

A different approach is to seek divorce counseling from mental health experts instead of lawyers. Divorce counseling can be a deceiving phrase because it is meant to ease the divorce process, not avoid it. Once you've attempted seeking help from a licensed counselor, divorce counseling can prevent a long, drawn out and costly legal fight if divorce is the only choice. Frequently, when couples divorce they are very resentful about kids and possessions. These feelings of resentment might be prevented if the couple seeks help in the divorce process. With the assistance of therapy, divorcing partners can achieve a feeling of closure and get ready to live separate and independent lives. They can be helped in making choices on how to divide property, arrange custody and visitation of kids, and arrive at an equitable arrangement.

It's quite apparent that divorces are painful to the participants. It is important to remember that they have an enduring effect on the kids involved too. After a divorce, kids often feel that any relationship they develop will ultimately fall apart. Deep-rooted and unexpressed anxieties and resentments can reemerge to destroy future relationships. Thus, it's smart to enlist the help of a family marriage counselor prior to doing anything drastic. This will allow you to reevaluate your circumstances. Ultimately, you might be able to avoid having your child experience a life full of regret.

Among the issues that are definitely grounds for divorce are abandonment, abuse, or adultery. Among the issues that can be remedied with couples counseling are money conflicts, intimacy problems, and lack of interest. While relationships are considered private, it can be helpful to get an unbiased party to try to discover the source of your problems and possible solutions. Techniques exist for resolving conflicts, communicating displeasure, and facilitating a sound partnership, all of which an expert, licensed counselor can provide.


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Counseling Services in Edmonton Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Edmonton.

relationship therapy

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Marriage Family Counseling Can Save Marriages

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Edmonton – What Support They Provide

In Christian homes when the husband does not assume his Spiritual Leader role a vacuum forms and often the wife is forced into being the leader. This is uncomfortable for the wife since God did not give her that responsibility. It can create a great deal of resentment in both the wife and also the husband who can interpret this as “control”.

When the wife is forced into filling this role it can often lead to being the leader in many other ways. Now there is real danger of inappropriate balance of control in the home.

In our Marriage Counseling practice we see this situation often. We are presented with couples that are not filling the roles that they were designed to fill. When we speak with the wife who is perceived as controlling by her husband, she often tells us that she would give anything to “get off the throne” and follow her husband, but he just won’t lead.

What can she do? What can he do? The first step is to understand who God has called us to be. God has called the husband to be the “servant leader” in the home, even going so far as to lay down his life for his wife and family as Christ laid down His life for the Church. We see many husbands who would step in front of a bus for their wives but neglect to protect their wives in the day to day business of life.

There may be a number of reasons why he is not “stepping up to the plate” as leader. Oftentimes we see passive men marry more outgoing and active women. The man’s passivity becomes a serious problem in these relationships. He stays in his comfort zone, not realizing or caring what this is doing to the relationship. In this case, it is important for the wife to step aside and not lead; even if things fall through the cracks. The husband cannot fill a role that is already filled. He cannot lead if she is leading. It may seem very scary, but it is absolutely necessary to let him fill the role.

It may also be that she has always felt like she is the one who should be in control, thinking her husband as incapable of leading. It is particularly important for her to turn over the reins to her husband.

Sometimes it has nothing at all to do with the wife. Some men are just so passive that it would never dawn on them to be the leader. In this case it may require counseling from your Pastor or Marriage Counseling from a Christian Marriage Counselor.

So, what should the husband do? After realizing and understanding that this is his God given role, he will need to confront the fear of operating in the unknown. His job is to make sure that he understands who is in Christ. There are many good books written on this subject. God gives us the Grace to do what He calls us to do, so the husband is able to lead.

There are practical things that a Spiritual Leader does. He makes sure that he has his own personal time with God on a daily basis. That he “talks” with God on a regular basis. This includes more than just speaking to God (what we normally call praying) but listening as well. He himself needs to be strengthened before he can successfully lead others.

He is responsible for making sure he and his wife spend joint time with God. This can include Bible Study, prayer, attending a Church that fulfills both of them and making sure the whole family is included if there are children in the home.

He is also responsible for protecting the home from any outside bad influences or spiritual attacks.

He can also see that he and his wife become active in a small group at their Church. This will help surround the couple with fellow believers who are like minded and are there for each other.

This may seem like a big job, but God never gives us a job too big for us to handle.

We pray that your marriage fulfills God’s calling and that both you and your Spouse search out what God has in store for you. If you both are close to God, you will be close to each other.

10 Common Myths About Counseling

The world is reeling under a host of problems, which, if allowed to fester, can bring about the destruction of nations and cultures. Drug addiction, terrorism, mal nutrition, poverty, sickness etc are the major threats to our well being, but comparatively lesser evils like non-compatibility in marriages and the resultant break-ups also can bring about the ultimate social downfall.


The importance of sustained marriages need not be overemphasised here. Like almost all problems faced by us, marriage related problems are also curable. It is easier said than done because marriage is the bringing together of two individuals with different mind sets, tastes and attitudes. At the marriage ceremony, the priest or the conductor tries to drive into the minds of the partners the necessity for adjustments and realignments in order to achieve a blissful married life.


Breaking up of families affects the children more than the adults. Such negative occurring creates an indelible mark on the impressionable minds of youngsters, thereby affecting their outlook towards married life. As a society, we attach great importance to living with the same partner through our lives, but many of us fail to achieve this desirable goal.


It is the realities in life that cause rift between husband and wife. In some cases, the partners are able to sort out everything amongst them, but in most occasions, they neither have the patience nor the inclination to work towards an agreement. In such cases, marriage family counselling by an expert is the only way out.


It is a fact that in many cases, such marriage family counsellors have actually succeeded to stop divorce. They try to drill into the heads of the warring parties that marriage is a journey together and conscious efforts need to be taken to make it a successful journey. The most common reasons for break-ups are infidelity by one or both partners, lack of understanding on issues affecting them, breaking up of communication channels, long distances in between and emotional abuse such as neglect. In some cases, it is just boredom that drives the partners apart.


Many marriages fall apart due to the lack of knowledge about professionals in the field of saving marriages. Experienced marriage family counsellors have actually mended fences, even in severe cases. The only stepping stone for many couples is the reluctance to enlist such professional help.


Couples can refer to marriage supporting tools like books and CDs brought out by well known marriage family counsellors to find ways to sort out problems. Attending marriage fitness camps, where the couple is made to interact with counsellors for long periods, may also help. Marriage fitness camps comprises of one-to-one phone sessions where both partners are counselled individually, with or without the presence of the other partner. Question and answer sessions, seminars and homework assignments (which should be completed by the partners together) are also part of such attempts to bring about peace between partners. E-mail sessions run by counsellors can also help to stop divorce.


A novel idea is the marriage fitness tele-boot camp where study and action material are delivered to your address. This is the best marriage counselling method where one of the partners is unwilling to get counselled in the presence of the other.


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Licensed Counselor in Grand Centre Alberta

Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Grand Centre.

licensed mental health counselor

In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.

Advantages Of Marriage Counseling

There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.

Counselling Service in Grand Centre – What Support They Provide

The film ordinary people is a film that depicts a family that is struggling socially due to some psychological problems that the members of the family are going through. The film depicts Conrad as a boy who is going through psychological problems due to an accident which occurred while he was sailing with his older brother Buck who died. The boy is also going through problems as his mother and father do not show him the love as they used to show his brother. He decides to go to see a psychiatrist. His mother has a disagreement with him for going to tell Dr Berger matters that she thought were supposed to be private matters. His father also struggles to connect with him in his depression. He regains some optimism when he falls in love with Jeannie but then the situation worsens due to the murder of Karen. He is advised by the Psychiatrist to understand his mother the way she is. The mother also has a problem as she isolates herself from the rest of the family including her husband Calvin who finally confronts her. In this confrontation, the mother decides to pack her belongings and leaves the family. When Conrad realizes that his mother has left, he blames himself and that causes the father to rebuke him. The father finally calms down and they are in a position solve their differences and they finally start working together so as to understand the reason as to why the mother behaved so towards them.

There are different types of theories that are used in a counseling session. Different theories are applicable to different situations or different cases. In the above case, the strength based theory would apply well in counseling Conrad's mother and father. This is a theory which focuses on showing the client the positive side of his or her life. This is done by guiding the client in the reflection of the past, present achievements or success. These successes are the ones that the client is supposed to use to face the challenges in his or her life. The main aspect in this theory is positive thinking (Sharry 2004).

There are many factors that contribute to mental health and psychological distress. There are social and biological factors. Traumatic injury of the brain usually causes mental disorders or heightens the risk of having mental distress, substance abuse which causes damage or dysfunction of the brain, viral infections, failure of the neurotransmitters systems to function properly and etc are some of the biological factors.  Social factors include life experiences that are stressful, rejection from close associates, some cultural features and abuse or financial problems. For these factors, the role of the counselor will be first to identify the cause of the problem if the problem and whether it requires medical interventions. Afterwards, the counselor should advise the client accordingly. If the problems are social, then the counselor is supposed to guide the client on the mechanisms to reduce stress over the problems and try to take another more constructive view of the problem. As I had earlier mentioned, the best intervention is making the client reflect on the successes in life and start working from there in solving the problem (Corey 2007).

There are values that are necessary for the counselor. As a counselor, I am supposed to try and build a strong relationship with the client. This should be done by giving an understanding that is empathetic which will make the client to have a compassionate understanding. There is supposed to be a show of genuiness and congruency. Then there is need to show the client respect because of the pain and suffering he or she is going through and also provide the client with hope for the future (Sharry 2004).

One of the strengths of the theory is that there is emphasis on the positive aspect of solving problems without minimizing them. This theory also helps the client in recognizing their abilities in solving the problems they are going through and also help them to put the solutions in practice. It encompasses a show of respect, security and puts more insights. However on the other hand, the theory can kill careers on the areas where one does not perform well. Sometimes it also becomes difficult to concentrate on successes. Sometimes the negatives assist in coming up with a positive perspective. It may not be so practical to do away with failures in life (Perdeson 2007).

The strength based theory would be applicable in counseling of Conrad's parents. This would work by showing them that they should be happy that Conrad survived the accident. They should also be reminded about the happier days that they have lived and loved each other in the past so that they can apply what they used to do then to their life now. It would also be good to make them appreciate their son as there are many people who would have liked to have a son but they do not and also appreciate the fact that despite what their son is going through, he can find a girl to love him. The goal of the therapy would concentrate on making the two find something to enjoy in life (Oren 2009). The best method to evaluate the therapy is for one to find out whether the parents are living happily together and also find out whether the parent's treatment of the son has improved. The limitation of this approach would be making the family forget the past and current challenges despite the fact that the challenges may appear again in future.

In conclusion, this theory can work very well with those clients who are having problems that have come out due to them filling their minds with a lot of negativity. It would help them to have a positive perspective in their lives.

References

Corey, G. (2007).Theory and practice in group counseling, Cengage learning

Perdeson, P. (2007).Counseling across cultures, SAGE publications

Oren, Z. (2009).Counseling fathers, CRC press

Sharry, J. (2004).Counseling children, adolescents and families: A strength based approach.

Marriage Counseling Retreats: A Haven of Hope

You may think about counselling when you are in a particularly difficult point in your life but what is counselling?

A counsellor will see you in a confidential and private setting, perhaps in your GP surgery or in private rooms. In the sessions a client will be able to discuss and explore personal difficulties, any distress they may be suffering or general dissatisfaction with life and purpose. Specific examples could be for relationship difficulties, family problems or bereavement.

By speaking and by being listened to, you, the client may begin to see things in a different way. You could see things from another point of view. Counselling can enable you to see a clearer path through your confusion. No counsellor will give advice or persuade you to take a particular course of action, there are no judgments, counselling is there to help you to take some control back over your life.

A counselling session will enable you to explore what might be happening to you and your feelings. We often experience feelings that we have felt unable to discuss with our loved ones and counselling can allow us you to understand those pent up emotions such as anger, grief or anxiety. A counsellor will encourage you to express those feelings and help you find some resolution for yourself.

By attending some counselling sessions, a mutual understanding and trust often develops which can help you to examine areas of your life that may not have occurred to you before. That understanding can also allow you to do some in-depth exploration of situations that you have found difficult and to make some small changes as a starter to allowing bigger changes as you develop options which may help you to decide what course of action or behaviour is best for you.

There are different forms of counselling and there are some cross over's between those. Those could be person centred, psychodynamic or cognitive to give you a few examples. Given that there are different techniques and approaches you may find it useful to talk to your counsellor in the first session to decide if the particular model they adopt will be one that you can engage with. Therapists have different training depending on what technique they use and some may have a specific approach to particular issues like eating disorders, addictions etc. A therapist may have trained specifically in one model but incorporate different techniques from others if they feel it might prove beneficial to a client.

Counsellors usually work for a mutually agreed period of time per session. This will usually be limited to 50 to 60 minutes per session in order that the therapist and you can maintain both energy and focus to get the most out of each session.

You can be assured that confidentiality is the bedrock of the counselling relationship and an essential part of trust. However there are situations when that is not an absolute. A counsellor is under a public duty to act in the public interest if there is serious risk of imminent harm to their clients or to others and they may need to make a referral to another agency in those circumstances. This is something that your counsellor will discuss with you in the first session when you agree the contract between you.

Whatever your issues, you will find that a counsellor will agree a contract and the boundaries of your relationship in your first session. That framework should cover dates and times of sessions, how and when there can be contact and that the relationship will be a professional one, your therapist is there to help you, they will not be a personal friend. You may find that your counsellor offers you a written contract outlining those factors. This should be welcomed by you as the first stage on your journey.


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