Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Kent.
In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.
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There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.
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Divorces don't have happy endings or simple solutions. Although some divorcing partners believe it is possible to break cleanly, their children might have issues of their own. It is easy to discount the toll taken on finances and feelings. Marital troubles may often be remedied by consulting a marriage family counselor, except in cases involving abuse.
Couples counseling has been able to stop many divorces from happening. Occasionally, troubles stem from failing to adequately express and communicate objectives, dreams, aspirations, or expectancies. With conflict resolution and communication skills, it is possible for a couple to regain happiness in a sound relationship. Expert, licensed counselors offer extensive backgrounds of training, study and expertise along with an unbiased opinion. Occasionally, individuals don't completely realize the underlying issues of a problem. When this is the case, a marriage counselor may help to pinpoint the source of the conflict. Partners are able to discover how to work through troubles, forgive, and go beyond the past.
A different approach is to seek divorce counseling from mental health experts instead of lawyers. Divorce counseling can be a deceiving phrase because it is meant to ease the divorce process, not avoid it. Once you've attempted seeking help from a licensed counselor, divorce counseling can prevent a long, drawn out and costly legal fight if divorce is the only choice. Frequently, when couples divorce they are very resentful about kids and possessions. These feelings of resentment might be prevented if the couple seeks help in the divorce process. With the assistance of therapy, divorcing partners can achieve a feeling of closure and get ready to live separate and independent lives. They can be helped in making choices on how to divide property, arrange custody and visitation of kids, and arrive at an equitable arrangement.
It's quite apparent that divorces are painful to the participants. It is important to remember that they have an enduring effect on the kids involved too. After a divorce, kids often feel that any relationship they develop will ultimately fall apart. Deep-rooted and unexpressed anxieties and resentments can reemerge to destroy future relationships. Thus, it's smart to enlist the help of a family marriage counselor prior to doing anything drastic. This will allow you to reevaluate your circumstances. Ultimately, you might be able to avoid having your child experience a life full of regret.
Among the issues that are definitely grounds for divorce are abandonment, abuse, or adultery. Among the issues that can be remedied with couples counseling are money conflicts, intimacy problems, and lack of interest. While relationships are considered private, it can be helpful to get an unbiased party to try to discover the source of your problems and possible solutions. Techniques exist for resolving conflicts, communicating displeasure, and facilitating a sound partnership, all of which an expert, licensed counselor can provide.
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This is a simple three stage approach to counseling. This process is for when someone comes to you with a problem or wanting to talk about something. It is for the 'normal neurotics like you and me", not for dealing with people with serious psychiatric conditions.
It avoids giving advice (a trap for any counseling approach). If you stick to this approach you will do no harm and will probably do much good.
Stage One: Listening
Listening means understanding the content and the feelings that go with it.
Cerebral understanding is not enough.
Never make a statement that defines the issue or the other person's feelings; ask instead. Not, "You're feeling . . . " but instead, "Are you feeling . . ? ". Not, "The issue is . . ." but instead, "You think the problem is . . ." or, "The way you see it is . . . ". At this stage it may be enough to say "uh-huh" or nod your head.
This stage ends when the person starts talking about the issues behind the problem. You will know you have done well when you get agreement to your suggestions of what the issue is and the feeling behind it.
Stage Two: Exploratory Listening
When the person talking to you feels heard they will move on to deeper things. At this stage you can start asking exploratory questions. Asking if they have felt this way before; What they have tried to do in similar situations - whether it worked or not; Whether there are other thoughts and feelings that are going on for them. You can, if you see something clearly, offer observations of what you see. Things like, "You seem happy/sad/angry . . ." and so on. Even here it is probably better to ask a question than to make a statement.
The critical issue at this stage is to stay in touch with their feelings at the depth they are feeling them.
If you can't do this, let them know; don't fake it. You can something like, "Sorry, I can't handle this right now." They will appreciate this more than pretending (and they'll always know if you are just pretending).
This stage ends when the issue is seen differently, a new insight is achieved.
Stage Three: Doing Different Things
Once they see things differently they can start to do things differently, or at least plan to.
The temptation when anyone comes to you with a problem is to try and jump to this stage immediately. This is a mistake. What is needed is the time to explore what is going on and to see it in a new way.
At this stage you can make suggestions of what has worked for you.
Don't get trapped into playing "Yes, but . . .".
If they give reasons why your suggestions won't work, don't argue. Instead, ask what they have tried, why it didn't work, and what they can do differently this time.
You may want to organize that they can check in with you so that they monitor how they are going with their new way of doing things.
This stage ends when they try out new behaviour with you or when they have a plan of the new behaviour they want to try with others.
This process is almost entirely about listening.
The other person always knows more about their own situation than you do.
Never offer advice about what they should do. In the third stage you may wish to say what has worked for you if you have dealt with a similar issue yourself.
With a little practice you can get quite good quite quickly at this process. You may well become someone people come to 'for advice'. As long as you do stick to this process, and don't offer advice, you will do much good and help many people.
More Information and Resources about Counseling Center
Wikipedia : Counseling Center Kent, British Columbia
CNN : Kent, British Columbia