Family forms the most important part of an individual’s life. Any kind of tension in the family ties leads to depression and sorrow. Due to constantly increasing workloads and pressures to prove oneself, individuals hardly get time to spend with their family members. This leads to gap in communication and eventual fights. This is where the counseling service in Saskatchewan can help solve various emotional conflicts within the family.
Out of the several issues, marriage is the most prominent, which requires delicate and skillful handling. The essentials of a good and sound marriage are love, communication, faith, trust, and commitment towards each other. The problems faced by the couples are better resolved when they are within the context of the couples’ relationship. A couple which is undergoing emotional turmoil seeks advice and help of professionals to smooth things between them. This kind of advice is called counseling.
When couples apply for counseling sessions, the counselor first tries to locate the problem. The counselors then try to mediate between the husband and the wife to bring out their opinions and points of difference. The counseling sessions provide the couples with the apt platform to talk about their views openly. This in turn facilitates them in understanding what the other was thinking and feeling all this while. The communication gap that was present at the starting of the counseling lessens with each successive session.
Marriage And Family Counseling in Saskatchewan
The world is reeling under a host of problems, which, if allowed to fester, can bring about the destruction of nations and cultures. Drug addiction, terrorism, mal nutrition, poverty, sickness etc are the major threats to our well being, but comparatively lesser evils like non-compatibility in marriages and the resultant break-ups also can bring about the ultimate social downfall.
The importance of sustained marriages need not be overemphasised here. Like almost all problems faced by us, marriage related problems are also curable. It is easier said than done because marriage is the bringing together of two individuals with different mind sets, tastes and attitudes. At the marriage ceremony, the priest or the conductor tries to drive into the minds of the partners the necessity for adjustments and realignments in order to achieve a blissful married life.
Breaking up of families affects the children more than the adults. Such negative occurring creates an indelible mark on the impressionable minds of youngsters, thereby affecting their outlook towards married life. As a society, we attach great importance to living with the same partner through our lives, but many of us fail to achieve this desirable goal.
It is the realities in life that cause rift between husband and wife. In some cases, the partners are able to sort out everything amongst them, but in most occasions, they neither have the patience nor the inclination to work towards an agreement. In such cases, marriage family counselling by an expert is the only way out.
It is a fact that in many cases, such marriage family counsellors have actually succeeded to stop divorce. They try to drill into the heads of the warring parties that marriage is a journey together and conscious efforts need to be taken to make it a successful journey. The most common reasons for break-ups are infidelity by one or both partners, lack of understanding on issues affecting them, breaking up of communication channels, long distances in between and emotional abuse such as neglect. In some cases, it is just boredom that drives the partners apart.
Many marriages fall apart due to the lack of knowledge about professionals in the field of saving marriages. Experienced marriage family counsellors have actually mended fences, even in severe cases. The only stepping stone for many couples is the reluctance to enlist such professional help.
Couples can refer to marriage supporting tools like books and CDs brought out by well known marriage family counsellors to find ways to sort out problems. Attending marriage fitness camps, where the couple is made to interact with counsellors for long periods, may also help. Marriage fitness camps comprises of one-to-one phone sessions where both partners are counselled individually, with or without the presence of the other partner. Question and answer sessions, seminars and homework assignments (which should be completed by the partners together) are also part of such attempts to bring about peace between partners. E-mail sessions run by counsellors can also help to stop divorce.
A novel idea is the marriage fitness tele-boot camp where study and action material are delivered to your address. This is the best marriage counselling method where one of the partners is unwilling to get counselled in the presence of the other.
Marriage Counseling: Helps in Making Healthy Relationships
The film ordinary people is a film that depicts a family that is struggling socially due to some psychological problems that the members of the family are going through. The film depicts Conrad as a boy who is going through psychological problems due to an accident which occurred while he was sailing with his older brother Buck who died. The boy is also going through problems as his mother and father do not show him the love as they used to show his brother. He decides to go to see a psychiatrist. His mother has a disagreement with him for going to tell Dr Berger matters that she thought were supposed to be private matters. His father also struggles to connect with him in his depression. He regains some optimism when he falls in love with Jeannie but then the situation worsens due to the murder of Karen. He is advised by the Psychiatrist to understand his mother the way she is. The mother also has a problem as she isolates herself from the rest of the family including her husband Calvin who finally confronts her. In this confrontation, the mother decides to pack her belongings and leaves the family. When Conrad realizes that his mother has left, he blames himself and that causes the father to rebuke him. The father finally calms down and they are in a position solve their differences and they finally start working together so as to understand the reason as to why the mother behaved so towards them.
There are different types of theories that are used in a counseling session. Different theories are applicable to different situations or different cases. In the above case, the strength based theory would apply well in counseling Conrad's mother and father. This is a theory which focuses on showing the client the positive side of his or her life. This is done by guiding the client in the reflection of the past, present achievements or success. These successes are the ones that the client is supposed to use to face the challenges in his or her life. The main aspect in this theory is positive thinking (Sharry 2004).
There are many factors that contribute to mental health and psychological distress. There are social and biological factors. Traumatic injury of the brain usually causes mental disorders or heightens the risk of having mental distress, substance abuse which causes damage or dysfunction of the brain, viral infections, failure of the neurotransmitters systems to function properly and etc are some of the biological factors. Social factors include life experiences that are stressful, rejection from close associates, some cultural features and abuse or financial problems. For these factors, the role of the counselor will be first to identify the cause of the problem if the problem and whether it requires medical interventions. Afterwards, the counselor should advise the client accordingly. If the problems are social, then the counselor is supposed to guide the client on the mechanisms to reduce stress over the problems and try to take another more constructive view of the problem. As I had earlier mentioned, the best intervention is making the client reflect on the successes in life and start working from there in solving the problem (Corey 2007).
There are values that are necessary for the counselor. As a counselor, I am supposed to try and build a strong relationship with the client. This should be done by giving an understanding that is empathetic which will make the client to have a compassionate understanding. There is supposed to be a show of genuiness and congruency. Then there is need to show the client respect because of the pain and suffering he or she is going through and also provide the client with hope for the future (Sharry 2004).
One of the strengths of the theory is that there is emphasis on the positive aspect of solving problems without minimizing them. This theory also helps the client in recognizing their abilities in solving the problems they are going through and also help them to put the solutions in practice. It encompasses a show of respect, security and puts more insights. However on the other hand, the theory can kill careers on the areas where one does not perform well. Sometimes it also becomes difficult to concentrate on successes. Sometimes the negatives assist in coming up with a positive perspective. It may not be so practical to do away with failures in life (Perdeson 2007).
The strength based theory would be applicable in counseling of Conrad's parents. This would work by showing them that they should be happy that Conrad survived the accident. They should also be reminded about the happier days that they have lived and loved each other in the past so that they can apply what they used to do then to their life now. It would also be good to make them appreciate their son as there are many people who would have liked to have a son but they do not and also appreciate the fact that despite what their son is going through, he can find a girl to love him. The goal of the therapy would concentrate on making the two find something to enjoy in life (Oren 2009). The best method to evaluate the therapy is for one to find out whether the parents are living happily together and also find out whether the parent's treatment of the son has improved. The limitation of this approach would be making the family forget the past and current challenges despite the fact that the challenges may appear again in future.
In conclusion, this theory can work very well with those clients who are having problems that have come out due to them filling their minds with a lot of negativity. It would help them to have a positive perspective in their lives.
Corey, G. (2007).Theory and practice in group counseling, Cengage learning
Perdeson, P. (2007).Counseling across cultures, SAGE publications
Oren, Z. (2009).Counseling fathers, CRC press
Sharry, J. (2004).Counseling children, adolescents and families: A strength based approach.
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