Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Parksville.
In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.
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There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.
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The strongest contributor to individual character development is the family unit. You may have spent years trying to change, eliminate, or copy the influence of certain members of your family unit-consciously or unconsciously.
Consequently, if anger is part of your familys culture, you have probably noticed that it tends to spread itself to future generations. The wider it has spread, the more difficult it is to contain.
Take a look at the way members of your family relate with one another. Is there a hurtful and biting anger present? Remember, our earliest experiences communicating, problem-solving and relating to others occurs within our nuclear family. Unfortunately, patterns of anger in these relationships are then recreated in later relationships and subsequent family systems.
Fortunately, counseling and an expert treatment plan can eliminate the damage of having lived in an angry or abusive family unit.
How Dysfunctional Anger Destroys Relationships
Anger is a very common destroyer of relationships. Couples, however, often underestimate or minimize its impact by sometimes reporting that it is this anger that makes the relationship feel alive. A very dangerous notion.
How does irrational anger start? It grows in relationships which are insecure and where open communication is absent. The emotion of love then becomes buried beneath years and years of hostility and resentment. In these relationships, helplessness often exists in the present and anxiety and fear overwhelm thoughts about the future.
The news is not all bad, however. The good news is that if you are motivated to take part in marital or family therapy you can be rewarded with new optimism and hope.
The following are tips on how to limit destructive anger in your relationships:
1. When you feel angry, mentally evaluate your feelings. Ask yourself if you are over-reacting or jumping to conclusions.
2. Particularly, if you have nothing to lose, start by giving others the benefit of the doubt. Ask yourself if you have taken something too personally or over-reacted.
3. Move to higher ground; get a broader perspective. When you feel resentment building, talk your feelings over with a loved one and get additional feedback.
4. If certain relationships are repeatedly fraught with anger, assess whether or not you should stay in them.
5. If your anger feels out of control and/or mysterious and particularly, if the relationship is important, consider family or relationship counseling.
How Do I Know If a Family Member Has an Anger Problem?
Most of the time angry individuals are aware that they have problems controlling anger. Unfortunately, many of them come to accept that their anger is unchangeable, a fixed aspect of their personality and feel hopeless to to do anything about it. If you wonder whether you or a loved one may have an anger problem, look for several of the following symptoms:
1. Becoming inappropriately angry in response to mild frustration or irritation.
2. Experiencing painful feelings of guilt or regret over something that you have said or done in a fit of anger.
3. The existence of repeated interpersonal conflicts that result from angry outbursts (legal problems, arguments, damage to property, school or work suspensions, etc.)
4. Family and/or friends approaching or appealing to you to control your anger.
5. Having chronic physical symptoms which are generated or exacerbated by too much anger, such as high blood pressure, gastrointestinal difficulties etc.
Where do I Seek Help for an Anger Problem?
Mental health professionals are very responsive to those who seek treatment for anger dysfunction. Referrals to treatment professionals and services are available through The American Psychological Association, The American Counseling Association and The National Association of Social Workers.
You may feel shame or guilt about your anger issues and these problems can actually change the lives of you and your loved ones, for the worst. Therefore, it is critical to consult with a counseling or mental health professional who has many years of experience in anger management training.
What Kind of Treatments are Available for My Anger Disorder?
The most common approaches to anger management problems include the use of individual and family therapies. These therapies help one to become aware of specific triggers and thinking processes which lead to chronic anger and demonstrate how to think productively, rather than irrationally.
Individual therapy explores the root of angry feelings and behavior in a counseling format that includes only one client. This counseling approach helps the individual to focus on the most important emotions causing his or her excessive anger.
Family therapy is a powerful and comprehensive way of repairing the damage caused by longer-term expressions of hurtful anger. Chronic anger commonly alienates family members from each other, resulting in strained communication. It can also cause members to be overly involved with one another in a very dysfunctional way.
Family therapy considers each members role in the dysfunction rather than just pinpointing one person.
How Marriage and Family Therapy Help
Marriage and family therapists, psychologists and mental health counselors are trained in how to identify anger patterns that pass from generation to generation. Identifying these patterns through counseling helps each client to explore his or her perceptions, prejudices and misunderstandings about the appropriateness of certain types of anger.
For example, when parents reflect on how emotions were expressed in their nuclear families, subsequent family members begin to understand the family's inherited concepts about anger and how to correct them.
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The primary difference between secular counseling and Christian counseling is the authority of which the counselor is held accountable. Secular counselors are licensed by the state in which they practice and must strictly adhere to the rules that the state has in place. These counselors may not pray with their patients or discuss religion at all unless it is requested or initiated by the patient. They may not provide counsel against things including abortion and homosexuality.
In contrast, Christian counselors will answer to the church. They are required to ask for God's help, offer religious solutions to their patients and pray with them. This creates a sense of responsibility by the church to over the activities that these counselors engage in. These are the most distinct differences between the two types of counselors.
Secular counselors will normally have a master's degree. Many of them will hold a PhD too. A religious counselor will have a degree from a university that specializes in religion while a secular counselor will receive training from one of the state certified schools.
Secular or non-religious counseling is dyadic in nature. It is based solely on the relationship between the counselor and his or her patient. While it is effective in addressing both emotional and mental issues, it does not consider spiritual matters. Christian counseling is triadic in that it not only is about the relationship between the therapist and patient but also involves the patient's spirituality. For this reason, Christian counseling is unique.
These therapists not only work to provide guidance in resolving personal and emotional challenges, but also are trained specifically to the patient see themselves as God sees them and help them to learn to accept themselves how they are. They must be able to help their patients to live and exhibit behavior that is in line with what is written in the bible.
Secular counseling involves many different designations including L. P. C. (licensed professional counselor,) L. M. F. T. (licensed marriage and family therapist) and L. M. H. C. (licensed mental health counselor.) The same can be said for Christian counseling who also feature a variety of designations. Some of them include L. P. C. (licensed pastoral counselors,) L. C. P. C. (licensed clinical pastoral counselors) and C. C. C. (certified Christian counselors) to mention just a few.
When seeking counseling from a Christian counselor, ensure that he or she was trained and licensed by either a church or other similar organization that will hold them accountable for their actions. Two of the most renowned associations include the National Christian Counselors Association and the Board of Christian Counselors.
What really matters when selecting a counselor is that you find one that is truly motivated to help you. Do not be afraid to request a telephone conference first to find out more about the beliefs that your therapist has to ensure that you both share the same religious viewpoints and morals. Taking this time in the beginning can save a lot of time and trouble in your search for the right therapist.