Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Saskatoon.
In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.
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There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.
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The strongest contributor to individual character development is the family unit. You may have spent years trying to change, eliminate, or copy the influence of certain members of your family unit-consciously or unconsciously.
Consequently, if anger is part of your familys culture, you have probably noticed that it tends to spread itself to future generations. The wider it has spread, the more difficult it is to contain.
Take a look at the way members of your family relate with one another. Is there a hurtful and biting anger present? Remember, our earliest experiences communicating, problem-solving and relating to others occurs within our nuclear family. Unfortunately, patterns of anger in these relationships are then recreated in later relationships and subsequent family systems.
Fortunately, counseling and an expert treatment plan can eliminate the damage of having lived in an angry or abusive family unit.
How Dysfunctional Anger Destroys Relationships
Anger is a very common destroyer of relationships. Couples, however, often underestimate or minimize its impact by sometimes reporting that it is this anger that makes the relationship feel alive. A very dangerous notion.
How does irrational anger start? It grows in relationships which are insecure and where open communication is absent. The emotion of love then becomes buried beneath years and years of hostility and resentment. In these relationships, helplessness often exists in the present and anxiety and fear overwhelm thoughts about the future.
The news is not all bad, however. The good news is that if you are motivated to take part in marital or family therapy you can be rewarded with new optimism and hope.
The following are tips on how to limit destructive anger in your relationships:
1. When you feel angry, mentally evaluate your feelings. Ask yourself if you are over-reacting or jumping to conclusions.
2. Particularly, if you have nothing to lose, start by giving others the benefit of the doubt. Ask yourself if you have taken something too personally or over-reacted.
3. Move to higher ground; get a broader perspective. When you feel resentment building, talk your feelings over with a loved one and get additional feedback.
4. If certain relationships are repeatedly fraught with anger, assess whether or not you should stay in them.
5. If your anger feels out of control and/or mysterious and particularly, if the relationship is important, consider family or relationship counseling.
How Do I Know If a Family Member Has an Anger Problem?
Most of the time angry individuals are aware that they have problems controlling anger. Unfortunately, many of them come to accept that their anger is unchangeable, a fixed aspect of their personality and feel hopeless to to do anything about it. If you wonder whether you or a loved one may have an anger problem, look for several of the following symptoms:
1. Becoming inappropriately angry in response to mild frustration or irritation.
2. Experiencing painful feelings of guilt or regret over something that you have said or done in a fit of anger.
3. The existence of repeated interpersonal conflicts that result from angry outbursts (legal problems, arguments, damage to property, school or work suspensions, etc.)
4. Family and/or friends approaching or appealing to you to control your anger.
5. Having chronic physical symptoms which are generated or exacerbated by too much anger, such as high blood pressure, gastrointestinal difficulties etc.
Where do I Seek Help for an Anger Problem?
Mental health professionals are very responsive to those who seek treatment for anger dysfunction. Referrals to treatment professionals and services are available through The American Psychological Association, The American Counseling Association and The National Association of Social Workers.
You may feel shame or guilt about your anger issues and these problems can actually change the lives of you and your loved ones, for the worst. Therefore, it is critical to consult with a counseling or mental health professional who has many years of experience in anger management training.
What Kind of Treatments are Available for My Anger Disorder?
The most common approaches to anger management problems include the use of individual and family therapies. These therapies help one to become aware of specific triggers and thinking processes which lead to chronic anger and demonstrate how to think productively, rather than irrationally.
Individual therapy explores the root of angry feelings and behavior in a counseling format that includes only one client. This counseling approach helps the individual to focus on the most important emotions causing his or her excessive anger.
Family therapy is a powerful and comprehensive way of repairing the damage caused by longer-term expressions of hurtful anger. Chronic anger commonly alienates family members from each other, resulting in strained communication. It can also cause members to be overly involved with one another in a very dysfunctional way.
Family therapy considers each members role in the dysfunction rather than just pinpointing one person.
How Marriage and Family Therapy Help
Marriage and family therapists, psychologists and mental health counselors are trained in how to identify anger patterns that pass from generation to generation. Identifying these patterns through counseling helps each client to explore his or her perceptions, prejudices and misunderstandings about the appropriateness of certain types of anger.
For example, when parents reflect on how emotions were expressed in their nuclear families, subsequent family members begin to understand the family's inherited concepts about anger and how to correct them.
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The film ordinary people is a film that depicts a family that is struggling socially due to some psychological problems that the members of the family are going through. The film depicts Conrad as a boy who is going through psychological problems due to an accident which occurred while he was sailing with his older brother Buck who died. The boy is also going through problems as his mother and father do not show him the love as they used to show his brother. He decides to go to see a psychiatrist. His mother has a disagreement with him for going to tell Dr Berger matters that she thought were supposed to be private matters. His father also struggles to connect with him in his depression. He regains some optimism when he falls in love with Jeannie but then the situation worsens due to the murder of Karen. He is advised by the Psychiatrist to understand his mother the way she is. The mother also has a problem as she isolates herself from the rest of the family including her husband Calvin who finally confronts her. In this confrontation, the mother decides to pack her belongings and leaves the family. When Conrad realizes that his mother has left, he blames himself and that causes the father to rebuke him. The father finally calms down and they are in a position solve their differences and they finally start working together so as to understand the reason as to why the mother behaved so towards them.
There are different types of theories that are used in a counseling session. Different theories are applicable to different situations or different cases. In the above case, the strength based theory would apply well in counseling Conrad's mother and father. This is a theory which focuses on showing the client the positive side of his or her life. This is done by guiding the client in the reflection of the past, present achievements or success. These successes are the ones that the client is supposed to use to face the challenges in his or her life. The main aspect in this theory is positive thinking (Sharry 2004).
There are many factors that contribute to mental health and psychological distress. There are social and biological factors. Traumatic injury of the brain usually causes mental disorders or heightens the risk of having mental distress, substance abuse which causes damage or dysfunction of the brain, viral infections, failure of the neurotransmitters systems to function properly and etc are some of the biological factors. Social factors include life experiences that are stressful, rejection from close associates, some cultural features and abuse or financial problems. For these factors, the role of the counselor will be first to identify the cause of the problem if the problem and whether it requires medical interventions. Afterwards, the counselor should advise the client accordingly. If the problems are social, then the counselor is supposed to guide the client on the mechanisms to reduce stress over the problems and try to take another more constructive view of the problem. As I had earlier mentioned, the best intervention is making the client reflect on the successes in life and start working from there in solving the problem (Corey 2007).
There are values that are necessary for the counselor. As a counselor, I am supposed to try and build a strong relationship with the client. This should be done by giving an understanding that is empathetic which will make the client to have a compassionate understanding. There is supposed to be a show of genuiness and congruency. Then there is need to show the client respect because of the pain and suffering he or she is going through and also provide the client with hope for the future (Sharry 2004).
One of the strengths of the theory is that there is emphasis on the positive aspect of solving problems without minimizing them. This theory also helps the client in recognizing their abilities in solving the problems they are going through and also help them to put the solutions in practice. It encompasses a show of respect, security and puts more insights. However on the other hand, the theory can kill careers on the areas where one does not perform well. Sometimes it also becomes difficult to concentrate on successes. Sometimes the negatives assist in coming up with a positive perspective. It may not be so practical to do away with failures in life (Perdeson 2007).
The strength based theory would be applicable in counseling of Conrad's parents. This would work by showing them that they should be happy that Conrad survived the accident. They should also be reminded about the happier days that they have lived and loved each other in the past so that they can apply what they used to do then to their life now. It would also be good to make them appreciate their son as there are many people who would have liked to have a son but they do not and also appreciate the fact that despite what their son is going through, he can find a girl to love him. The goal of the therapy would concentrate on making the two find something to enjoy in life (Oren 2009). The best method to evaluate the therapy is for one to find out whether the parents are living happily together and also find out whether the parent's treatment of the son has improved. The limitation of this approach would be making the family forget the past and current challenges despite the fact that the challenges may appear again in future.
In conclusion, this theory can work very well with those clients who are having problems that have come out due to them filling their minds with a lot of negativity. It would help them to have a positive perspective in their lives.
Corey, G. (2007).Theory and practice in group counseling, Cengage learning
Perdeson, P. (2007).Counseling across cultures, SAGE publications
Oren, Z. (2009).Counseling fathers, CRC press
Sharry, J. (2004).Counseling children, adolescents and families: A strength based approach.
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