Sometimes a person might have some trauma, memories, or patterns that create unhealthiness in their behavior, and in their lives. As such, they might need the help of qualified professionals who are trained to help this person get to the bottom of their emotional problems. These professionals are also able to help a person create strategies for new and healthy coping tools. These professionals are called counselors. They offer professional counseling service in Watrous.
In order for a person to become and to offer counseling service, they have to first take classes in social issues, psychology, and other courses dealing with people skills, and in conflict resolution. It’s important to keep in mind that those who offer counseling service aren’t psychologist. They aren’t medical professionals, although a psychologist can counsel people. A professional counselor works exclusively to help people solve their live issues, and their emotional issues.
Seek Marriage Family Counseling Before You Decide on a Divorce
There are many types of issues that can be manages, and even resolved with professional counseling. These issues can include phobias, smoking cessation, people skills, self-esteem, and other issues dealing with one’s emotions. Life issues that can be helped with counseling service can include grief, life changes, public speaking, and family services. Sometimes, a romantic couple or a married couple might find that they need counseling service. There could be major issues that might cause the demise of the relationship. There could be issues with respect or boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes a couple might want a mediator, because they need a neutral party to help them work through disagreements. As such, couples counseling is a very popular form of counseling service. This type of counseling has done a lot to save relationships, marriages, and families.
Counselling Service in Watrous – What Support They Provide
There are couples who stay in an unhappy relationship for the sake of their children. Those who cannot withstand the disagreement and conflict brought by the relationship often end up in divorce. The common mistake of couples is that they fail to consult a marriage counselor to help them with their marital problems. There are those couples who let things happen and do not think of the possible consequences of their actions. Some are afraid and even ashamed to consult a marriage counselor because they do not want other people to know about their problems.
Not all people are the same when it comes to problem solving, there are those who can easily find solutions and there are those who cannot. There are people who cannot solve their problems nor face whatever issue is bothering them. Relationships fail because of many factors. Marital problems are often brought by alcoholism, infidelity, addiction to different substances and many more. Some marriages fail because they do not see marriage counseling to be an effective tool to help them with their problems.
With the help of a certified marriage counselor, married couples will realize better ways on how to solve their conflict. Some of the things that the marriage counselor do is that they teach each partner about proper communication or the right way to talk to their partner. The feature of a good communication skill includes respect and a calm attitude. Open communication gives the partner a little space for them to voice out their opinion in a calm way.
The advantage of marriage counseling is that both partners will learn to address the needs of their partner. Couples will realize as soon as they talk to the marriage counselor that there is a big problem that they need to address. If couples know how to voice out their thoughts in a nice way, then there are great chances of having a healthy relationship. A marriage counselor can definitely help them in developing a sense of oppenness so that they can share whatever problem is bothering them.
Another advantage or benefit of marriage counseling is that couples will learn to express themselves in a positive way.
Some institutions can help couples when they have problems, marital problems brought by drugs or any other form of addiction can be addressed by family therapists and mental health institutions.
The duties and obligations of each member will be upheld in marriage counseling. If the couple will learn about theor obligations to their partners, they can solve any problem that they will encounter.One of the reasons why marriage counseling is effective is because of the activities and progress reports conducted on the couple. A marriage counselor can help save the marriage, especialy if the couples become participative.
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This is a simple three stage approach to counseling. This process is for when someone comes to you with a problem or wanting to talk about something. It is for the 'normal neurotics like you and me", not for dealing with people with serious psychiatric conditions.
It avoids giving advice (a trap for any counseling approach). If you stick to this approach you will do no harm and will probably do much good.
Stage One: Listening
Listening means understanding the content and the feelings that go with it.
Cerebral understanding is not enough.
Never make a statement that defines the issue or the other person's feelings; ask instead. Not, "You're feeling . . . " but instead, "Are you feeling . . ? ". Not, "The issue is . . ." but instead, "You think the problem is . . ." or, "The way you see it is . . . ". At this stage it may be enough to say "uh-huh" or nod your head.
This stage ends when the person starts talking about the issues behind the problem. You will know you have done well when you get agreement to your suggestions of what the issue is and the feeling behind it.
Stage Two: Exploratory Listening
When the person talking to you feels heard they will move on to deeper things. At this stage you can start asking exploratory questions. Asking if they have felt this way before; What they have tried to do in similar situations - whether it worked or not; Whether there are other thoughts and feelings that are going on for them. You can, if you see something clearly, offer observations of what you see. Things like, "You seem happy/sad/angry . . ." and so on. Even here it is probably better to ask a question than to make a statement.
The critical issue at this stage is to stay in touch with their feelings at the depth they are feeling them.
If you can't do this, let them know; don't fake it. You can something like, "Sorry, I can't handle this right now." They will appreciate this more than pretending (and they'll always know if you are just pretending).
This stage ends when the issue is seen differently, a new insight is achieved.
Stage Three: Doing Different Things
Once they see things differently they can start to do things differently, or at least plan to.
The temptation when anyone comes to you with a problem is to try and jump to this stage immediately. This is a mistake. What is needed is the time to explore what is going on and to see it in a new way.
At this stage you can make suggestions of what has worked for you.
Don't get trapped into playing "Yes, but . . .".
If they give reasons why your suggestions won't work, don't argue. Instead, ask what they have tried, why it didn't work, and what they can do differently this time.
You may want to organize that they can check in with you so that they monitor how they are going with their new way of doing things.
This stage ends when they try out new behaviour with you or when they have a plan of the new behaviour they want to try with others.
This process is almost entirely about listening.
The other person always knows more about their own situation than you do.
Never offer advice about what they should do. In the third stage you may wish to say what has worked for you if you have dealt with a similar issue yourself.
With a little practice you can get quite good quite quickly at this process. You may well become someone people come to 'for advice'. As long as you do stick to this process, and don't offer advice, you will do much good and help many people.
More Information and Resources about Relationship Counseling Center
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